Attachment coaching For People who are tired of repeating the same painful patterns
Clarity, Security, Real change.
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ABOUT ME
You have done everything you were supposed to do. The journaling, the therapy, the communication, the meditation. Yet your relationships still fall into the same confusing cycles.
That is not because you are broken.
It is because your attachment system learned survival patterns in environments where your needs were not centered or fully supported.
I know this because I lived it too. Even with years of mindfulness, emotional work, and a clear understanding of the systems I grew up in, my relationships kept collapsing in predictable ways. The turning point
MY APPROACH
My coaching helps you understand what your attachment system is doing and why it makes sense.
Your patterns did not appear out of nowhere. They developed in response to your environment and the expectations placed on you.
I help you:
identify your attachment cues
understand the fears your system is trying to protect you from
see how cultural and relational power shaped your reactions
break out of anxious, avoidant, or mixed cycles
communicate in ways that feel safe and grounded
validate your emotions instead of fighting them
build relationships where both people feel respected
This work is practical, relational, and centered on how your system actually behaves in real moments of stress or connection.
WHO I WORK WITH
I work with people who want clarity about their patterns and their emotional world.
You do not need to know your attachment style. I help you understand what your system is doing and why it responds the way it does.
I support people who:
feel like they are too much or not enough
panic, shut down, or overthink during conflict
carry the emotional weight in their relationships
keep choosing partners who cannot show up
learned to minimize themselves in order to stay connected
grew up in systems that centered men and ignored their needs
move between closeness and distance without understanding why
Many people believe their reactions are personal failures. They are not.
They are survival strategies shaped by family roles, social expectations, and the pressures placed on you long before you had language for any of it.
You are not imagining your patterns.You are living in a system that taught you how to survive, not how to feel safe.
WHAT CHANGES THROUGH THIS WORK
Clients often begin feeling:
overwhelmed
anxious or shut down
unsure of what they feel
confused by their patterns
afraid of conflict or emotional intensity
Through this work, they gain:
a clear understanding of their attachment system
stable internal grounding
the ability to speak their needs without fear
real tools for conflict and communication
an inner sense of safety that does not depend on someone else
a realistic understanding of how culture and power shaped their story
The goal is not perfection.The goal is clarity, steadiness, and trust in your system.
CLIENT EXPERIENCES
“You do not realize what safety feels like until you experience it.”
“I used to live in constant fear that the relationship could fall apart at any moment. Working with Dylan helped me understand what my system was doing and why I reacted the way I did. I now feel steady in moments that used to overwhelm me.”
“I can stay in conflict without shutting down.”
“I used to take everything personally and spiral for days. Now I know how to name what I feel and stay grounded. I do not lose myself in the conversation anymore. I feel like I finally understand my own reactions.”
“The tools gave me clarity.”
“The journaling, the parts work, the nervous-system resets, and the way Dylan explains attachment helped me see my patterns without shame. I understand why things felt so hard, and I know what to do in the moment instead of panicking.”
WHAT WORKING TOGETHER LOOKS LIKE
This is not general relationship advice.
It is practical, attachment-specific coaching grounded in real emotional experience.
You will get:
clear explanations of what is happening in your system
support during real moments of conflict or shutdown
scripts for conversations that feel overwhelming
nervous-system grounding tools
targeted journaling prompts
parts-work exercises for self-trust
weekly action steps that fit your capacity
This process works because it is shaped around your lived experiences and the world you came from.
FREE WITH YOUR CONSULTATION:
YOUR FIRST SESSION BLUEPRINT
Every new client receives a First Session Blueprint.
It is a personalized Google Doc I create after the consultation that turns everything we discuss into a simple and actionable plan.
Your blueprint includes:
a clear summary of your attachment system
the patterns that keep repeating
your activation cues and safety cues
personalized journaling prompts
a look at how your environment shaped your reactions
the tools that will help you move forward
what to track in your relationships this week
You leave with something real and specific to your system.
FREQUENTLY ASKED QUESTIONS
What happens during the consultation?
We spend 30 minutes mapping the attachment patterns running your relationships. You will leave with clarity about what your system is doing, why it keeps looping, and what the path out looks like.
Who is this coaching for?
Anyone dealing with anxious patterns, avoidant responses, fearful avoidant cycles, shutdown, overwhelm, conflict looping, or repeating relationships that do not make sense. You do not need to know your attachment style.
Is this therapy?
No. Coaching is practical and future oriented. It focuses on patterns, nervous-system responses, communication, and the impact of real-world systems on your emotional life. Many clients work with me alongside therapy.
Do you work with couples?
Yes. I meet with partners together and individually when helpful.
How long do people work with you?
Most clients meet weekly for 3 to 9 months.
Is this LGBTQ+ affirming?
Yes. My work is inclusive of all genders, identities, and relationship structures.
How much does coaching cost?
Pricing is discussed during the consultation. The consultation is free.
How do I know if this is the right fit? You will know when the explanation of your patterns suddenly makes sense. Most clients feel this during the first call.
READY TO CHANGE YOUR PATTERNS?
Your first step is simple.Schedule a free 30 minute consultation.
You will leave with clarity, direction, and a personalized understanding of your attachment system and the environment that shaped it.
SCHEDULE AN INITIAL CONSULTATION
Begin Your Path Toward Secure Attachment
Download my free guide “Breaking Free from Insecure Attachment” and receive weekly tips on how to develop a secure and fulfilling relationships straight to your inbox.
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Testimonials
Dylan's coaching was refreshing, insightful, and uplifting. I received very useful guidance from Dylan who has a keen ability to listen deeply, and facilitate the process of inner discovery. I was super impressed with his wisdom, gentleness and kindness in working with me through some challenging emotions that were tied up in past beliefs and emotional processes. I am a therapist who has done lots of personal therapy work on myself and I found the coaching to be similarly healing. Also, the coaching felt somewhat joyful in that it was a collaborative and creative process. Dylan is very, very good at going to the heart of matters. I recommend him highly as a spiritual life coach and I plan to return to him for more coaching myself. He is a great resource!
NANCY O
As a person confronting multiple stressors (divorce, upheavals at my co-owned business, troubles with my teenager, pandemic, etc.), I have found Dylan's support to be skilled, compassionate, clear-eyed, and refreshingly authentic. Dylan has helped me clarify and stick to my boundaries in a big way, as well as develop and refine practical plans for unraveling various knotty issues. In the past when I have sought help for various problems, too often I would encounter "help" that was less than helpful, especially in the form of being overly directive, paternalistic, authoritarian, or judgmental. Dylan, on the other hand, is truly collaborative— I find his relational demeanor offers me profound empowerment. I so much appreciate his insights, consistency, realness, and capacity for deep listening, and feel increased confidence in my own ability to maintain resilience and set and reach goals. If you are looking for a coach who will genuinely show up for you, I recommend Dylan.
JENNIFER L
Dylan's coaching was refreshing, insightful, and uplifting. I received very useful guidance from Dylan who has a keen ability to listen deeply, and facilitate the process of inner discovery. I was super impressed with his wisdom, gentleness and kindness in working with me through some challenging emotions that were tied up in past beliefs and emotional processes. I am a therapist who has done lots of personal therapy work on myself and I found the coaching to be similarly healing. Also, the coaching felt somewhat joyful in that it was a collaborative and creative process. Dylan is very, very good at going to the heart of matters. I recommend him highly as a spiritual life coach and I plan to return to him for more coaching myself. He is a great resource!
FURQUAN
“...He is also kind and quite funny if you connect with his sense of humor, which makes it easier to be honest and vulnerable when talking about sensitive issues.”
Dylan is an amazing coach! He helped me at probably one of my most vulnerable points.He’s a good coach because he didn’t just study. He’s been through his own personal development journey in attachment and that’s what makes him such a good coach! He allowed me to rewire my brain to identify what was healthy and not.He allowed me to understand how to co parent with my ex, childs father who is strongly avoidant, he helped me identify and understand my attachment more, he has been the most patient person and also understanding, honestly couldn’t recommend him enough, it’s a percentage of me doing the work but the remainder having a good coach to break through in a secure place!
MI ADIE
I’ve been working with Dylan now for the last 8 months. Before we started chatting I was going through a lot; struggling expressing my needs and setting boundaries. After we started chatting, we worked together on getting past some trauma and setting boundaries so it doesn’t happen again. I’m in a much better place after working with him and have now recommended Dylan to a few friends of mine.
ERIK N
I have an anxious attachment and my partner is avoidant, so we all know what that means. We are a couple since more then 20 years. We started the coaching with dylan in spring 2023, shortly before ending our relationship. We had such hard conflicts, which really stressed us so much. Because of the coaching my partner could open up a little bit more and reflect about his behavoir and his needs. In fact we had less conflicts and longer periods without stress and fights. We had ups and downs for sure but dylan really helped us to regognize the important points, the needs of ourself and the other person and how important it is to hold sapce for the emotions of the partner.
BERTA
Begin Your Path Toward Secure Attachment
Download my free guide “Breaking Free from Insecure Attachment” and receive weekly tips on how to develop a secure and fulfilling relationships straight to your inbox.
GET YOUR FREE GUIDE